Tuesday, June 28, 2011

update...

wow, almost 2 months later and still no update. In the midst of wedding season, I got a bit overwhelmed. I've had the recent chapter started for quite awhile and will try to finish it up within the next week or so! please stay tuned!

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Ara: Episode 4

I can't believe it took me so long to get this posted, especially considering I started it over a month ago. I guess the last month has been really busy though... and to boot... this is a short one! Ah, well, makes for fast reading :)

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Though Ara knew she hadn't blinked, he was gone. That crazy feeling began to surface as she looked around a little too frantically, convinced he was going to just reappear. Had she hallucinated again? Then thinking to check her phone's text messages to confirm she had at least gotten that. But it was gone as well. So. What? Her hallucinations were supporting each other? Or was he just fucking with her? She felt her anger rise, the heat, as if her blood was boiling, move up through her face. She paused and took a deep breath feeling it simmer. No need to get angry if it was her own imagination.

She shoved the last bite of glorious muffin in her mouth, grabbed the bread for Jasper and threw her messenger bag over her head, shoving the phone in the front pocket. Stalking off down the sidewalk, walking straight through the space her Luca apparition had been standing.

------------------------

When Luca had seen the look on Ara's face the second he'd dropped his glamour, the panic was back. Within seconds, before he knew what was happening, his appearance had changed to a portly balding man. Quickly stepping in the line for the bakery, he'd clicked his phone awake and hit the 'rescind' button on the text screen. He watched the emotions play out on her face and in her reactions, feeling the sickness in his own stomach, the overwhelming anxiety - hoped she wouldn't figure out what happened. Catching glimpses of her thoughts: hallucinations vs. him being an asshole. Great. Neither of those were the case.

What had happened? He just now paused to think. It hadn't been a conscious change. The chameleon like reflexes were often triggered by strong emotion, but he'd learned to control that years ago. He'd Seen that she would be here. Knew the bakery from his walks - it was conveniently between his apartment and The Cafe. His mind was prepared, but his body rejected and acted on it's own, making him feel vulnerable and out of control.

She stalked by him and he felt the waves of confusion. He forced his mind back in control, turned and jogged several steps following her as he released the glamour, appearing again as Luca.

"Ara!"

--------------------------

She heard her name, knew it was him and took another step or two before stopping. Her heart beating so fast and her emotions entirely uncontrolled. She took a deep breath feeling everything start to come back in to balance. Her initial reaction was to turn around, defensive and angry and spout off some clever remark. It made her think of the first time they met - her tiny indignity stomping her foot and stalking away. The thought made her smile. Amazing how childish behavior surfaces regardless of age. In the brief moments she stood there, he didn't say anything. So she walked a couple more steps, testing her sanity but also being a bit playful now. She knew he was there, could feel him radiating behind her, the attraction already building - like two magnets being pulled together regardless of what lay between them.

"Ara...?" he spoke more softly and with a slightly humored questioning tone.

"Yes God? It's me, Ara. You're coming through loud and clear." She had a tiny smirk on her face, glad her humor had taken over instead of turning around and yelling at him. She could feel him now, closer behind her, almost touching maybe or so it felt. She wanted to glance behind her and see how close he was, but also wanted to keep this up a bit more and see if he would play along.

"hmmmm... god now am I?" Luca whispered in her ear, she could feel the warmth of his breath and of his body standing behind her, his hands lightly on her arms.

"Oh hi Luca," she said casually, "I thought you were someone else" Her voice trying to play off her inner excitement while her body acted of it's own accord and she wrapped her arms around his neck, snuggling in her cheek, she could feel the strong pulse of his carotid artery. It felt like home. As much as she wanted to indulge though, she had to get to work. She released her arms and took a step back, relishing as his hand lingered.

"Well, considering you seem to be following me, I'm sure you know I'm headed to work. Do you want to walk with me, or do you have some other stalking to do?"

"Oh hush. You're the only one I'm stalking". He took the bread bag from her hand and wrapped his other arm around her shoulders as the started down the sidewalk together, like they did this every day.

She threaded her arm around his waist and leaned her head on his shoulder, hoping he wouldn't look down and see the giant grin on her face. She was supposed to be mad at him wasn't she? They walked in silence for awhile. For Ara, just absorbing his energy, his closeness... and not really knowing what to say in the few minute trek to work. Not really the time for any discussion. Hi. How are you? What have you been up to the last 9 years. Quick, the 5 minute version, I have to go make sandwiches and serve coffee. The mental conversations were all jockeying to be winner, but she kept her mouth shut. He was no doubt trying to get a read on her. Well, let him. Maybe he could pick out something coherent in that chaos.

They were nearly at The Cafe now. "Do you want some coffee or tea or anything?"

"No, not now, I'll come surprise you later." He brushed the little strand of hair off to the side of her face.

Ara relished the romantic cheesiness of the gesture, the gaze of his amazing eyes were a little too much to handle right before work though. "Okay, well, I'll see you later then!" and she turned and went in to work. The quick getaway. Except he was standing outside with her bread. Classic! Back out the door and he held the bag out to her. "See... I told you I'd see you later," grabbed the bag and went back in again.

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til next time,
xoxo

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Update

As stated earlier - this is not a final draft. So I will be going back and editing details from previous episodes as the story in my head develops. Initially when I started, the city I imagined was New York City. As remembered through the eyes of my seven year old self (eight? something small and very young). And honestly, that was the last time I was there. Since most of what I am imagining is just that - what is in my imagination - I decided to change the name of the city so it will not be specifically based on New York City. That way I don't have to worry about the accuracy of city streets, blocks being the right size, stores/shops in the correct location, etc. And I'm not a serious enough writer to have the time or energy in to travel and research. Alas, my life is that of a wedding ring maker yogi. :)

I hadn't necessarily planned on giving notice when I went back and changed any details, but this seemed necessary.

It is also leading in to how the whole background of the story develops, so it will make more sense to be an imaginary quasi New York City. Also a tidbit - New Atlantean City is NOT going to be anything related to Atlanta... if you know me, you probably have a slightly better idea of what I might be thinking, but I'll get to that later.

That's all for today. Lots brewing, so I'm hoping a next episode will be ready in a couple weeks!

til next time
xoxo

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Ara: Episode 3

With closed eyes and a few calming breaths - her mind started to organize it's memories of Luca. Some of which may have been authentic, while others might have had a bit extra creative imagination thrown in. With distant memories it was sometimes hard to tell.

The first met when Ara was 5 and Luca was 6 - he was almost exactly a year older... a year and 9 days older to be exact. Ara was collecting wild medicinal mushrooms for her grandmother. Her two favorite "pet" spiders were along for the search and actually helped uncover any that may lay hidden under the brown and decaying leaves or behind a fallen log. They were lovely, big and hairy beasts that would scare the pants off most people, but to Ara, they were as family as any cat or dog.

Luca was in a clearing playing with his insectual entourage as well - a couple of giant stag beetles the size of small dogs. They were 'sword' fighting - Luca with a stick and the beetles with their large mandibles, obviously going easy on him.


Ara was trotting along keeping up with her buddies who were on the hunt and would have missed seeing him if she hadn't stubbed her toe on a hidden root. She'd cried out in pain, not thinking anyone would hear. It was fine to be weak and cry when no one was looking, so she relished in her alone time. Knowing the future reign she would hold meant that in front of other she had to always be strong.

Luca heard her though and quickly turned and jogged over to her with concern radiating towards her. Embarrassed for appearing weak, Ara quickly stood up straight and composed her tiny little features. Looking deeply in to his eyes and stating fiercely "I'm fine", and skipped away.

What she'd seen in the depth of his eyes for that few seconds bound them instantly and Ara could feel the attachment as she continued on her hunt.

Her daydream easily wove itself in to the next related memory of them walking through the same woods, holding hands ever so gently and with the sense of adolescent nervousness. Ara wouldn't have felt it on her own, but his energy was radiating so strongly she'd lost her own sense of composure, absorbing his feelings as her own.

"Excuse me, Miss?" Excuse me?!" - the lady next to her seemed to be directing her hot breath in Ara's direction. Ara looked at her with a questioning look.
"Your phone's been ringing," she said, looking at Ara like she was an idiot.

And well, now she kind of felt like one. She'd gotten so deeply lost in her memories, the world seemed to fade away. She might have even had her eyes closed, she wasn't so sure now. She looked at the phone still clutched in her hand and saw she had indeed missed two calls, both from Jasper, her boss at The Cafe. And a voicemail. She dialed in her password and listened as his raspy Brooklyn accented smokers voice filled her ear. "Ara, if by some strange chance you are running late today, I messed up with the last bread order and we're short. Can you swing by the bakery and pick up the extras? I called it in already. It's fine if you're late. Be here by 8 if you can though."

Excellent. As she glanced at the clock she realized she'd missed her stop - but the bakery was two past hers and she was almost there. The universe was on her side today. She would have been late, now she could still make it to the bakery and The Cafe in plenty of time. Maybe she could even just sit at the bakery and ponder on this a bit more. Try to work it all out, at least enough that she could focus for the next few hours at work.

She already felt totally consumed with the thought of him. She knew it would be only a matter of days that she could hold out before wanting to see him, smell him. She knew it was weird, but he smelled so good. He smelled of spring time freshly tilled earth, new life budding, with a hint of green and a subtle flowery scent every once in awhile; never quite the same, as if a soft breeze was coming from somewhere else and through him. He smelled like her woods. If a smell could be broadcasted like a radio signal, he was transmitting from her land.

She wondered what he looked like in this world. Surely she would recognize him, regardless of what he's said in his email. There's no changing the eyes. Oh sure, contacts were common to create the usual human eye colors, but nothing could change what she saw in him. Like a kaleidoscope, whirling and flashing images of the past, present and future. She'd seen herself in those eyes many times.

And then she remembered that day. Her headphones on, drowning out the the city noises the best she could, and coming back from another random work errand for Jasper. She'd seen the packed cafe and was walking with briskly. Though she'd been mostly focused on getting back to work quickly, she had glanced down past the door of the cafe and seen Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome standing stock still in the middle of the sidewalk like a statue. She remembered the spark now, that lasted just a split second as her attention was brought back to work again and barrage of customers she was about to deal with. As she replayed the memory, she paused on his image and saw what she'd ignored. She had seen it shining his is eyes and played it off as another of her many visions or daydreams. Her heart back to pound with excitement again as tried bring all the details back.

Ara blinked again and realized she made it completely out of the subway and above ground already and was just a block away from the bakery, wondering if she had some how learned to teleport. Or maybe her legs had just learned to work completely independently of her brain. Not such a bad thing she guessed.

She was beginning to smell the delicious bakery scents, fresh bagels and muffins, scones and bread of course, like a thick comforting blanket that made her tummy rumble. It was only 7:13 and the walk to the Cafe wasn't more than 20 minutes or so. A yummy breakfast was definitely in order. This bakery had a few vegan treats that made her mouthwater. Her current favorite were the morning glory muffins. Really, they might as well just call it carrot cake. Full of walnuts and raisins and warming, comforting spices.

The line was out the door, not really because there were that many customers, but since most of their clients were wholesale delivery orders, they used most of their small space for actually baking. The counter was only a few steps in the door, enough space for 2 - 3 people. Ara went around to the side delivery door instead.

"Hey Marcus!" Ara said as she stepped up in to the warm kitchen.

"Ara! So good to see you! I would hug you, but eh" he shrugged and smiled broadly. He was covered in flour and dough, having just unearthed a giant ball of dough from one of the industrial mixers. Marcus was one of those jovial grandfather types that seemed to love everyone. Bushy gray hair and mustache - kind of reminiscent of Einstein actually. And Ara liked going to pick up their orders just to see him. She imagined that was how his business did so well for the past 40 years.

Laughingly, Ara said "It does me good just to see your smile and smell your wonderful creations"

"Ah! You are too sweet" and his smile widened more. "How you are not married yet, eh, I do not know. But you are not here to talk about your love life. Jasper called and I have your order ready. Katie!! Bring Ara's order!" He shouted to one of his employees. "Do you want anything else this morning? Banana bread? Scone? Your favorite morning glory muffin?" he said, grinning and wagging his eyebrows like it was a special little joke between us. When really, everyone at the bakery knew her latest obsession with them.

"Yes please," Ara grinned.

"Katie! and a muffin for Ara" Marcus shouted and Ara wondered how much coffee he drank in a day. His mind always seemed to move at rapid speed you generally couldn't have a conversation last more than 30 seconds before he was on to another topic or doing something else entirely.

"Thanks Marcus! Have a great day!" Ara walked up to the door that led to the front counter to meet Katie for the hand off. She thanked Katie, dropped a 5 in the tip jar and headed out the front door to see if any of the tables were free. One was open and she placed the bag with the bread on the table, took her messenger bag off and dropped it in one chair, taking a seat in the other as she pulled her phone out. She got her beloved muffin out of the bag and began to unwrap it. Thinking again of Luca. She took a bite and closed her eyes and decided she would just send him a text message. Short and sweet. Wiping her sticky fingers off, she clicked on the email and read it again. she'd been writing replies in her head, little snippets here and there, nothing that would be a complete message or really if any of it was what she wanted to say yet. She highlighted the number and clicked the SMS option and typed "I miss you too" and hit send before she could change her mind. That was a reality she could deal with being honest about.

Sitting back in the chair, she continued with her muffin. Allowing the thoughts to run through her mind and begin to digest. No more than a few minutes had gone by when her phone beeped at her. She clicked to see the new text, surprised and excited to have heard back from him so soon. It said "Good Muffin?"

Ara looked up quickly to see Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome standing at the back of the line. Only slightly different, now looking more like her Luca. Again with the heart palpitations and she wondered if the look on her face was reflecting the shock she felt inside.



til next time, xoxo

Friday, March 4, 2011

Ara: Episode 2

As Ara grabbed her messenger bag and keys, she double checked for her Blackberry and wallet. When she found her phone, she noticed the blinking red light signifying a new message - secretly hoping it was a text from her newest crush, then thinking, oh wait he doesn't even have my phone number. With a roll of her eyes at her own silliness she clicked the phone and saw it was a new email - a personal one at that and from an address she didn't recognize.

"It's Been A Long Time, Ara"

was the subject.

Now that sounded intriguing and almost better than a surprise text from a secret crush.

Checking the clock, she still had 10 minutes before she absolutely had to leave and reading it on the computer would be so much easier than that tiny phone screen. She relished few more seconds of mystery as to who the author was as she rattled the mouse, waking up the computer from its nap.

The email was much shorter than it seemed on her phone, now on the big screen, she easily saw the end of the email

Always yours,
Luca


Her heart fluttered and almost stopped as time slowed; the world seemed to disappear all but the name on the screen.

She wasn't sure if 10, no, 9 minutes was enough time to digest what was about to come. It'd been what, 9 years... 9 minutes... always 9 with him. They'd been together (sort of) for 9 years - grown up together in that other home. Had he done it on purpose - waiting 9 years until just the right day? checking the date she realized it wasn't the 9th, but w/ a quick addition realized the date did add up to 9. She snorted as the irony? and her irritation drew her back to reality.


Dearest Ara,
It has been 9 long years since you disappeared. After you left, it broke my heart to not leave and look for you. Every day for months it was all I could do to not drop everything and come look for you. Knowing you wanted to leave and be alone was a daily reminder and I wanted to respect that. And to be honest, being hurt and stubborn kept me from going as well. My duties nearly doubled with you not there and your sister was none too happy - she decided giving me your share would be punishment and preoccupation from going after you.

Your departure inspired many others to leave as well and within a few years your sister decided it was time to have an overseer on this side. So many of ours are here now and there is much communication between the two sides. I stay rather busy with traveling and recent years brought me to the city so frequently I decided to move here a few months ago. I'd be lying if I didn't admit I felt a strong pull from you, though I could never explain it and most of the time just pushed it aside. I thought if you wanted me, you had the power to easily find me.

Which brings us to my writing you now.

As you know I have a penchant for walking. After I moved here I made a creative plan of walking every block of every street. Until one day I saw you walking straight towards me, looked right at me in fact - but I've gotten quite good at my glamour (you would be so proud) as I've found it necessary to stay hidden even here because of the rapid increase in our numbers, and... well, there is much I should explain. Regardless, you didn't notice me, or at least it didn't seem to register if you did.

I was too startled to know what to think or do, but within a few seconds you had turned and walked in to The Cafe - and with such purpose I figured you'd either become a coffee addict or you worked there. I wanted to follow but felt at a total loss nor did I trust that revealing myself would not cause a total scene.

A little bit of searching easily found your email (nice articles about the spiders by the way - you do love some irony). Over the years I've thought of you so often, but never as much as the past few months. The sight of you was intoxicating, knowing you were here and so close.

I feel a bit presumptuous in saying I hope I hear from you and maybe even see you or see each other rather, as my subtle stalking has given me brief glimpses of you. It's just... not enough Ara. I miss you. There is so much I want to tell you and so much I want to hear. I fear this has all been too wordy and disjointed... I would love a response or a call even, if you feel like it.

Always yours,
Luca
777-575-5416


Ara's head was spinning. Luca. How many times she had thought of him, dreamed of him. She felt totally stunned as she made her way out the door - phone in hand and opening up the email again. She'd become so absorbed rereading it over and over, she didn't realize she was on the subway until the large thighs of the uh, big, woman squeezed in next to her. Had she missed her stop already? Why had she not just called in sick? Could she even concentrate on dealing with customers today if she had somehow made it all the on the train without noticing?

Checking the time again she realized she indeed had not missed her stop. She had the timing down to a precise science and knew there was still another 4 minutes until she had to get up. That was time enough to get her head clear. Closing her eyes, she took a few deep breaths.

*****



Luca sat with his eyes closed feeling absorbed in the song - he'd put it on repeat since finishing the email to Ara. It had been included in the email, then he deleted it at the last minute. Thinking, well, maybe it just would have been too much. As if the email wasn't? Slight notions of panic rose and fell as he took a few deep breaths. He would never get over her, but he needed to be okay with the fact she may not respond. With his eyes closed and breath coming more easily he watched the feelings spin around, the panic beginning to fully subside as acceptance took it's place. It was sent, nothing to do now but relax and try not to feel like he was waiting. He checked his watch, still early, but maybe not too early to go ahead and start the daily rounds, especially if a walk by the The Cafe was in order.


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til next time, xoxo

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Ara: Episode 1

***
Story background - the fabulous group of metalsmiths and jewelers I'm a part of - EtsyMetal - had a group challenge based off Project Runway. One of the weekly challenges was to create a piece and a story to go with it. I was thrilled! For a long time I've had plans of writing short stories and creating pieces that may appear, or are blatantly written in to the story. Similar to a painting or drawing depicting a scene, but an actual object created. And the result was the beginning of this story, which I have been wanting to continue since it started and that was over a year ago... It also does not have a title yet - neither does the other story brewing. So for simplicity sake, I'm just going to distinguish them by the title character(s) names. Since this is an incredibly informal format, much of the writing will be something like a first draft and not necessarily properly divided in chapters. So that's my disclaimer and the background of how this story started and the image at the end. It was originally on my regular blog, here.

*****

Ara spread out her hands, stretching and contracting them. She’d been sitting at her computer too long and her hands were going numb. Out of the corner of her eye she saw it again, the web, but knew if she tried to look at it, it would be gone again. So instead she just looked past the screen out the window at the city lights. How something could be so dark and lit up at the same time she would never understand and didn’t want to. New Atlantean City. It was not her city and it never would be. She’d been here a year, living in the cubicle called an apartment (which thankfully had a nice view) and she still didn’t know her way around. She doubted she ever would.

The buildings made her sense of direction completely off, cut off more like it. Cut off from nature, the trees, the sky, the sun even.

But being in The City, that was the dream wasn’t it? Every 20-something wanting to make it big. She’d been writing free-lance for the past 6 months and as glamorous as she liked to make it sound, the $400 a month it earned her was barely a drop in the bucket.

This latest article was for the blog World Wide Weavers - Spiders of the Interwebs. Lynyphiidae - Sheetweb Weaver Spiders brought in a whopping $50. The sad thing was that she had spent the last 3 hours staring at the computer screen or out the window and hadn’t written more than four words. At this rate she calculated, she would probably be earning less than minimum wage by the time she finished it. She sat staring out the window so long that the screen went its hibernation blackness, maybe it was time for her to go to sleep as well. It was 2:00 am after all and she had to be up in three hours for her morning barista shift.

The wonderful comfy rolling chair made it easy to glide over to bed, fall sideways, and just ease right in to sleep, she was practically there anyway.

Almost as soon as her eyes closed they opened again. Staring up at the ceiling as the Spider twirled down from its web towards her face. She’d named it Charlotte for fun, it seemed more magical and less frightening, except there was no talking pig here.

Ara kept her eyes opened and watched as Charlotte climbed back up the thread and continued her construction. Or destruction as Ara knew it to be. Spiders were the first defenders of nature. A corner sat untouched for too long quickly becomes inhabited by a spider, especially a corner in her home. She tried vacuuming a couple times a week and it didn’t seem to do any good. The fact that she wasn’t sure which ones were real and which ones were imaginary didn’t help matters either. They were simply drawn to her. She was their queen.


The sound of her alarm soothed her awake, it was "jungle noises" this morning. A harsh contrast from the city noises. Even the early morning city noises of the concrete jungle were a far cry from soothing.

A quick shower and light make-up was all she needed. She left her clothes at work, Ara couldn’t stand the smell of coffee permeating her home as well. Her rumpled clothes she fell asleep in would do just fine for the quick subway ride to work. She figured she looked better than the average homeless person, so that was probably good enough. No need to look in the mirror. What she saw wasn’t what the rest of the world saw, so it seemed kind of pointless. Every once in awhile she still caught a glimpse. Her friends had thought it strange to not have a mirror in a bathroom, so she put up a small one. The hardened web that formed the crown on her head was the most striking and borderline silly aspect of her otherness. She was glad no one could see it. Finding a job was hard enough and she doubted it would earn any extra tips from the groggy caffeine deprived patrons.

And also glad that she couldn’t actually feel it. The last time she had was about 30 seconds after she had stepped through the Door. So much felt like a distant memory or a hallucination. She knew it was safer to just stay on this side.



til next time, xoxo

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

What is this?

Way back in the day, I had dreams of being a writer, amongst many other things like architect (too many straight lines), first female president (no thank you), scientist, inventor, etc... of course, artist winning out because it was what I wanted most and specifically jeweler/metalsmith as my current career path. (hence the anvil, clever huh? and it actually is one of my special anvils)

I wouldn't say I'm a person that gets bored easily, but I do like to have variety in my life. With my most recent achievement of becoming a yoga teacher, I feel like it is opening up my life to becoming more balanced and accomplishing a lot of those random things I think of doing but don't make the time for.

So by setting up this blog, I'm giving myself the space to be a bit more organized and consistent in my writing. There are two different stories I've got brewing - one of which I started on my regular blog (I think I'll copy the beginning here). The other is just beginning (gasp!) on paper.

I tend not to make specific plans or deadlines, so who knows how long in between posts, but I'm aiming for something like once a month or two... or twice a month... we'll see. But I hope you come back and give me a bit of your time. That's it for now - hope you have a lovely day!